The Resident: Bun in the Oven

This funny little online video is about how society is telling me that now would be a good time to have some offspring, and I’m just not feeling it yet. I don’t want kids right now. And I don’t know if I’ll want them in the future. So all you people who keep asking me, especially the ones with crying, drooling, stained kids bouncing on their hips — stop it. Stop it now. End the pressure. I don’t understand why people pressure other people to have children. Maybe that’s because I don’t have them, and they’re really trying to do me a solid. Maybe they are just brainwashed by our culture into thinking that there is a set time for having a baby in your life. I’m sure the love you experience when you have kids is like nothing else. I get that intellectually. So maybe people with kids who are pressuring me to have kids are really just trying to make sure I get to experience that love while I’m on the planet. Maybe. Maybe NOT, too. Somehow I just feel like they want me to be as miserable as they are, or as tired and overworked, or as frustrated with watching their own me-time and career goals get harder and harder to reach. This is not a nice picture I’m painting, I realize. But still. I can’t help but feel like they’re reaching out to me with sticky, drooled on, goopy-fooded-on fingers chanting, “come join us…come join us…” Anyway. I still don’t want kids yet. Maybe one day I will, but until then, all you baby-pushers, kindly shut up. NOTE: This personal video is one of my all-time favorites and has been shown whenever I speak at conferences, conventions, etc. It always get a laugh, and women always be coming up to me after to say IFEELTHESAMEWAYOHMYGOD! That’s why this video from my web talk show rules.